27 Nov

Dodging Questions on Thanksgiving

 

 

I love Thanksgiving because majority of the people are empathetically cautious because they’ve got gratitude on top of mind.

Thanksgiving is also the one holiday where you spend time with family without having to exchange presents (ugh, gluttony). You get to eat lots of fattening food without being judged by ANYONE (well, maybe by Russians). You also get to SHOP and get crazy deals (because gluttony, again).

I personally don’t eat turkey and I despise the color orange. But what I love most about Thanksgiving is the gratitude. I love that we can all get together with no expectations of gifting. I am enough on Thanksgiving.

Along with the gratitude come the annoying, intrusive, embarrassing questions and requests from our relatives. Not to mention the awkward run-in with an ex from high school.

 

THEY WILL ASK ABOUT YOUR PERSONAL LIFE

Aunt GertRUDE loves dabbling in this category. There is no shame in her questions. She will straight out ask you if you’re gay? She will shamelessly remind you that your eggs are dying. You do not have to answer her questions but you also don’t have to be rude to the namesake. Simply put your hand on her shoulder and say to her, “You are so sweet to be worried about me!” And then walk away =) VOILA!

 

THEY MIGHT ASK ABOUT YOUR JOB

It’s usually the aunt or uncle with too many kids who ask you endless questions about your job in California because they know come next year they’re going to be calling you to get their son Sammy a job in Tinseltown. Keep it light by saying that a lot of people have been off work for the holidays so you’ve been really busy and it’s so nice to be with family not having to think about work. Or, share a few vague facts about your company and then ask them what their first career move was like? People LOVE to talk about themselves.

 

QUESTIONING YOUR DIET

For your own sanity, I beg you to please not barge into your grandparent’s house and get all PETA on them. Don’t talk about your new vegan diet or the awful killing of turkeys. Just compliment the veggie dishes you can eat and politely pass the meat platters onto the person next to you. Only share your new diet with people who are genuinely interested, otherwise you’re going to feel defeated and look back on Thanksgiving 2017 as hell.

 

ASK YOU WHO YOU VOTED FOR PRESIDENT

Zip it!!!!!!!!!!! It is not the time and place for politics. And especially these days, there is no middle ground so we’re all screwed (literally and figuratively…and intentionally) This is when you excuse yourself for the restroom.

 

ASK YOU WHAT YOU’RE THANKFUL FOR

You keep this generic, short and sweet. You can say, “I am thankful for those who love and accept me and grateful to be invited to this Thanksgiving dinner.” Also, this is a great time to thank the host!

 

ASK YOU ABOUT YOUR PLASTIC SURGERY

This is a personal favorite of mine. People always think I get Botox, fillers and plastic surgery. But the truth is that I don’t and I’m also not against it so it doesn’t offend me. However, I do think that when Aunt GertRUDE makes such statements they can be excruciatingly annoying. I find that the best way to answer that question is to be entertained by it. Meaning, I usually follow it up with, “do you think I got Botox here?” as I point to my wrinkly forehead.

 

ASK YOU WHY YOU’RE SO PICKY

If anyone ever asks you why you’re picky, you tell them it’s because you know exactly what you want, need, and deserve.

 

ASK YOU FOR TECH HELP

When they ask you to fix their dated tech gadgets and you’re a millennial. This one is tough because when someone asks for your help, you can’t help but to want to help. Especially when it’s something as harmless as a fax machine. But you also have trouble finding help on Google because no one has ever done a tutorial on how to fix a fax machine on YouTube. There is no getting out of this one because we must help our elders!

 

Disclaimer: All content on The Anna Report and comments by Anna Kachikyan are provided for general information and entertainment purposes only. Such contents and comments not intended as medical, legal or psychological advice and should not be used as a substitute for advice from a licensed professional.